kairos
one person said she loved that word - only one - well i have an ultra kairos underway now - and thats the point of them, one cannot cheat. It has to be the time - one knows when deep in deepest soul its THE time..
Sacrifice... oh woe is me....
This is a true sacrifice: a real one. Not some ferink
hysterical idiotic melodrama everyone else lives by. Because this ‘project’ or more properly put
just long lived way of being, that is unquestionably worth rolling out a little
into the public domain, has been my real purpose for a decade. I have wonderful material – from footage to wry
observation and a few insights as good as Herman managed in his magnificent Siddhartha.
Not special-people clever sounding keys to the soul, nope universals that i
know are so easy to find if you let go, and have real space and focus to notice
how lovely and useful they are. And i know few if any thinkers get to these
evolutions. Because i read and listen a lot.
It has for years been my planned pleasure time to start to
roll them out. And i care not for money from them. And the last few months i
have captured quite a few little wonderful zen moments which
are in my ‘can’, but havent just yet the
time due the only sacrifice i shall ever again make - theres just no point caring any more as i am
an absolute expert at working with the wonky, but theyre all so wonky now
(though pretend otherwise) that its just not possible to ever make headway
(small scale environmental and egalitarian community initiatives) which mean si
am ENTIRELY so so joyously free... except for one little bugger in the woodpile
cos my ask just one question thing is going far far better than i imagined.
I mean the key to life – one of the ‘zens’ – i discovered 12
years ago in a truly bereft state, askthe person you really do KNOW from years
of tolerating their sourness, is the least likely to give you a useful insight
into a dilemma, their thoughts on said dilemma...it works wonders. As long as you ask them sincerely no matter ow
much you decry ‘them’
So... him!! I mean he
was meant to give number one arsey energy theif answer....but he didn’t. He
gave the answer one doesn’t want to hear, if one is going to give p ever caring
one second ever again!!
Cos he was the hardest of all cases.
This isnt cryptic i have several recordings i shall put here
later. Thing is i do need to act as if this will work, because i’m getting good
new energy in folk, which will only actually work if some others join in with
me.
i understand brexit. Unfortunately. The only human on the planet i love more than the averaged is my own lass who is 50% European DNA - even if all humans' DNA is so mixed up the last 100,000 years there is no 'european'... we are all one. But i had to listen to everything for years to try and be up on it as i care for her future. I also understand politicians - unfortunately from the mid 00s i knew half a dozen pretty well. I had a 'role'... and the last few months i work (freelance no one tells me what i can do i just decided i would) with several regional politicians on an important last ditch river saving initiative. I like these two one woman and one black man in an extremely KKK region - they are sincere and full of passion, but they are useless.
so in short, all politicians when it comes to larger matters are venal. definition - big stuff like doing something imaginative...trying again to visit the EU question for example...
But thats the way it is. We don't have any more Tony Benns ...so find a SOLUTION.
They need 'license' - meaning f by some miracle there was some uncheatable system whereby they heard millions of voices who were not manipulated, bribed, subject to ANY 'public' discourse... just of the moment - now or next year...
If they heard maybe a million REAL voices (not 'gamed' not able to be hacked or spun).. call me a silly dreamer but i know they cannot get this 'data' - even official polls are warped one way or other even by the question. And anyway the forces of division will always find a way of knocking some 'establishment' poll..
a million ordinary voices saying (NOT yet another digital lifeless one dimensional petition) what they think about going back to the national issue again...
Just a mad idea i had the moment darling Liz - the second one in a few weeks, was no more...
what if we just found a way to ask people ... cos anyone with a brain knows the whole hilarious shitshow of the last few months is all because of brexit...
BUT WE MUST NOT CHEAT...it must be pure !!!
THE ONE QUESTION: others are much more interesting and groovy but for now
here are two today - unplanned, espesh the first one of my newfriends
q1
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1DF7pfdUdkPEWmEOOgI6d8Y8_is7Hv-8w/view?usp=share_link
q2 is with one of my 5 year energy thief regular debating 'friends' - usually face to face (he's a bit tin foil hat it can be not fun)
AND - it is sometimes ok to use a white lie - when one knows someone is so so so smartasserati that he cannot just answer a question from a 'friend' who has even looked after his young children... there is no 'famous journalist'... but then he isn't who he makes out he is and DOES like the notion of the 'famous'...and it WORKED! :-)
q2
https://drive.google.com/file/d/11IpVUtbUsfUO3S8egUYQBtjerfgkeo2R/view?usp=share_link
#2 refers but i decry his smartarse "no we cannot afford the green energy..." horrid man not ALIVE... alive = let go just DO it!!!
Oh... theres another real sacrifice too.
Because i call myself sort of a writer. I write in various (online) venues. Quite incognito - the stuff i REALLY like. Stream of consciousness poetical... and i never even link anyone unless i think i know them - in person, and they have true soul. There are only a few. I do not seek attention.
But the best one of these 'venues, by far the most ever unimaginable is
myself riffing daily with a cowriter. We seem to have managed to go somewhere
in proper poetry i think may be new. It is utterly spontaneous. It is ALL a ‘poetical
response’ to your hysteria cant and vanity the last ¼ of a decade.
He knows..i know... somewhere where we get to daily - and we never for a moment TRY to develop it
it just comes – out of an absurdist line in gorgeous soulful sedition, does
have to be shared with the world. It is beyond ‘freedom of speech’. It is the
daily affection between maybe the only two people left in the world who know action speaks louder than words – he loved
his friend in a way, still visits, despite him being Mister number 1 bigot. And
my friend brown. He is above all judgement but still needs a true ‘friend’ who
despite every other word being a magnificent competition to find the most
pointed puns in counter attack, is an ACTION – he knows i value his attention,
alone..it s worthy. And he knows the same of me.
That sounds pious but wait until one day the world does read
it. I have a large library of all sorts of intellectual ‘dialogues’. I know no one
got to where we have by accident ended up. But it must end. The sacrifice is i
need to somehow finish it by starting it – to roll it out. And wasting one millisecond on yet another
some year friend wo last week was hot -
to talk what he is going to do next, politically, and then the next week so
cold one cannot get through, is just so so so time wasting....
And a sacrifice. As is this but i need to ‘close’ this long section
of my life with grace and dignity and at least i understand myself. As it is
all so so universal, and simple.
TO END
prior to within a week just get up what i LIKE doing and am so so good at - interesting little clips about ways to ultra simplify life - keep it to bare minimum so one has time, and spare cash to enjoy what MATTERS... thinking, having space to engage with crazy women who waste your time, philosophise, write, ponder, discover no one REALLY gives a fuck about ruined rivers especially if their facebook says they do... and just walk..
Those clips will be here very soon. They are what i like about myself most. So fuck you for assuming.
and the other 'assumers' - many times the last 7 years i warned folk against this chappie
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_Watson_(Labour_politician)
but even i am shocked - surely one oft the very worst things the last 20+ neo-liberal years has been the way even New Labour 'deregulated' gambling. Hundreds of thousands of lives damaged by that. Local towns to me for example Ludlow one sees many shops shut even in the main square, while new gambling shops open where real shops once were including in the main historical yeo olde worldish square.. To think he dared to sit next to the often 'right thinking' people of Corbyn's front bench and so soon after was taking the gambling shilling. . It is the ultimate in a land of the worst imaginable cynicism.
BUT cynicism won. Fair accompli is a great thing to understand. Did one's best...now go...
The end part 1 - 4
