cloaked unlisted page please private only if invited...simpler this way...
copy of message today to someone sums all up some applies some not..
ANY INTEREST JUST SPEAK...human to human...all this messaging has ruined humanity....
call any day from 05.30 to 9pm... always up at 5.30... doesn't mean you have t be if you want to be on the job with me .... but i always am...every day a new smiley day...
For info...my EXTREMELY private
facebook and personal blogs... herald a woman as greatest modern broadcaster by
far...and i know ALL the intellectuals.... Meghan (here see link on other pages)
I am a sad old git who does
nothing but hillwalk and think of a lass lost and also quietly listen out –
search for..the few good voices who will tell truths. Rigorous ones...
(please can someone join Meghan’s
group – babes in the desert...and get her home phone number for me or Hepola
would do.... true heroines of our time! I want to marry either of them even if
not keen on yanks..))
Here,
seriously...deadly serious for me as it sort of became my 'life's work' 5ish
years ago. I sort of loosely mentor and morally support half a dozen women who
have face to face shared with me the utter two faced dangerous toxic crap uk
became. And they are almost always ultra goody goodies. Mothers, in one case a
local wonderful (VAN LIVING IN!) reverend who is a mother of 4 daughters. She is really interesting - may well visit me
today for us to begin plotting how to get my writings out a bit more - they are
about forgiveness - the real
version... she knows i am the rea deal
as she had a terrible malicious false allegation thing against her from a woman
and thus is spurred (by me) into not bullshitting about people being genrally
nice, any more.... ditto a
hay-on-wye many year very very popular woman who has just lost 50
grand as a music festival she had started had the plug pulled by a devious man
who is nationally famous.... as a goody goody philosopher. (she hated me for 10
years til...i offered to actually help
her arrange to make public statements forgiving him.... may work.
its all
deadly serious - some oft hese women,
maybe the Rev.. maybe the empressario, SHOULD get involved one day in politics
or the like.... so our children have more sincere and authentic women at the helm...
they all
sort of 'fear' my stoicism and wisdom but gradually they realise i am fairly right
and a good influence...
Anyway one
(a younger woman - 37,) quite well known
within Greenpeace - one of their
promotion team, and quite on the face of it sincere... she recently face to
face admitted most of her work with them
is ineffectual BS....
Anyway i have the best job in world (last 2
months)but need a woman ...WITH kids in
tow is fine... to be around me as i work over the next few weeks as the landowner is one of the an
tragically messed up people and i need a chaperone (there would be no trouble
if she saw a team of two at work..)
read last
para for best links etc.
here are
messages i sent to several about this. Got to find someone urgent. its a
PARADISE unsed stable block... if she warmed to some horsey person who she got
to know organically and slowly, she would let them start a business there -
best hacking spot in the country!
serious...she has said so to me herself but is very unhappy and
withdrawn so will never get it going herself
messages:
Thurs
17:12
You sent
Here wanna
learn ultra eco farm fence building and
outbuilding renovations ...or know anyone else but they MUST be mellow sane
people ....and female not for the obvious reason but see message ..i am expert
at rebuiding fences etc such that old materials are reused (VERY few farmers do
that) and also doing work that lasts so that use of resources is
minimised...all by hand..i need a cowaorker for a bit - super easy stuff any
woman could do ..
i sent
this message to a sort of friend but she wont reply i know..hardly anyone ever
seems to... (lots typos my laptop
keyboard is very broken)
hi just in
case a message here may actually go to messages that get read - it may
seem weird but i sent you a message from the only facebook account i
sort of keep an eye on though rarely use my Ralph Rural account and it says
this in a fuller way that explains all
but as i don't use facebook routinely
i have no idea if messages from non friends ever get anywhere to be read
Anyway i
have a need to employ someone - could be
a few days on few days off, to do the easiest work ever in the most gorgeous
hill setting ever. The need is real - i
try to explain. School holidays i wondered about you. it could be for 2 weeks
or 2 months the work is there for 2 months but a few days on off over the next
2 weeks is my urgent need.
The
location is 1 mile from a train that is a 1 change only run to London 3 3/4
hours 57 quid.....quite extraordinary as its a little station middle of nowhere
LLangunllo...
i kind of have
some pictures and bits of film here. I knew for 3or 4 weeks it will come to
this.
https://ruralralph.blogspot.com/p/mister-strong.html
In fact i
cannot continue my work at this
site unless i find someone and they have
to be a little rugged - like outdoors,
and female...
very very
loose schedule any old 3 or 4 days a week or it could be a 7 day stretch (with
me) if someone wants more cash
basically
the family that inhabits (65 year old woman and her 90 year old dad) as i knew
has certain issues - probably even
abuse years ago....terrible loneliness (self imposed) , and a certain amount of occasional
angst - this would ONLY bubble out
towards a man. (she has history). If a woman were around as my paid
assistant - just helping hold posts
while i rebuild fences etc - dead dead easy work... it would be peaceful. This is nothing personal
to me, just a pattern likely the case for decades.
I have
encountered this before.
SO i need
an on site paid chaperone hahh hahh... even if i have lasted 2 mths already at
site ... but i am tired of the sometimes
personal comments that come my way from a lonely person... they wouldnt if there were two people at the site.
there
could be 3 or 4 weeks more work...maybe 20 hrs a week average (more if wanted
to do it that way - i like to have loads time to walk hills a few hours every day
so i dont hurry)
site at
1500' lovely mountain breezes.
beach is
an hour drive away if break wished there (photos on page linked above)
the
property though, despite being very high up in sparsely populated region -
almost a hidden high up shangri la valley
- loads wildlife... likely has cctv so its a safe place ...
assuming
anyone disliked me thats no problem i dont care just wish to find some fairly
sane person to pretend to be on side with me
in loose team and the one thing i do care about is its a truly lovely
job in a unique place and it will be wasted if i cannot find anyone. Meaning
someone somewhere will love this unique oppourtunity ... sort of paid ultra
lovely holiday in hill if someone likes the hills...
i cannot
'advertise' openly as the family are extremely paranoid its all a bit sad
really but i have them under control though do need a sidecick - too angsty one
person alone there....
the message i sent on the other facebook is
this next bit, i so so so dont use either i do only use 07727 eight four 0 304 (personal numb my other is for my work) if interested
pt 2 but
just infil and private only to those who care to speak truth of environment
message
few weeks ago
Thank you
for disconnecting from the other facebook. As an artist you may just ‘get’ the
following ( i do like your painting by the way), which is irrelevant as it is
the past but for 5ish years starting with my ex partner - she offered to be
first volunteer, a range of people indicated some interest in even free
learning activities at the space i sort of tried to resurrect (best eco place
by far for miles) but all such interest was little more than saying what
pleases others. So that facebook is sort of a performative testament to what i
know is many years the ‘issue’. But that is a sort of personal past life i
enjoy privately to ponder chronicling one day, otherwise it is irrelevant –
just experience. Don’t worry i don’t wish to “connect” I share one or a couple
of simple things for a simple reason. And it is quite simply that i know the
one most fabulous aspect to existence is if a person actually causes someone to
else to change, Even if the change (in this case) is a return to a better mode
already experienced. And by ‘change’ i do not mean assumed mental adjustment
that turns out often to be a little self regarding, i mean actually doing an act.
And only because i encountered you i have had just such a change – of the
reversion kind. A change that has lead to an act. It is that having for some
months shut my mind down to the idea of there being ANY vaguely down to earth,
sincere, sane woman left on the planet – or certainly UK I had entered a sort
of shut down mode. Prior to a few months ago I often had quite good energy in
respect of being attempting new encounters – enjoying putting myself in
situations where i may make them – albeit in daylight as as I Am a night-time
hermit. But i had fizzled and wound down any hope. Which made me mentally shut
down. I had accepted that new state and assumed it was now for good. But then i
encountered you. And as a result of even if I am of no interest at all as any
kind of even friend it seems that my energy has returned in that department. It
is only due to meeting you. I know what makes me tick or what really does
motivate me. Or whom... The energy returning because of an unexpected encounter
- and i do mean it i know most are asleep and in fact shut down and cowardly –
but not you, has got me even having a last flail tarting around a bit online
answering a few date posts on Awakened souls dating ..... https://www.facebook.com/groups/6021131961260783
even if i know better and it is the usual
hilarious web of nonsense. So many lost souls! Putting up “off grid life in the
hills sought” and then...hahh hahhh they don’t even get beyond their scrotty local
corner shop. God there are so many truly lost folk online. Tragic. Send 4 nice
messages to four stating they wish to connect and only one may even be
read...(and the standard reply if more than 2 lines is “i am rather
overwhelmed” tragic...no one can read any more....But nothing ventured nothing
gained. I do know you are rare. I shall not say ‘unique’ as that would Make me
appear some obsessed fruitbat which half a dozen women of my acquaint in the
region i think would confirm i am not. What people not do (or say) is often
more interesting than what they do. You did not claim any syndrome, illness;
disability, label, label, or label..... in fact like me your only real
dissatisfaction i heard was not getting on too well with the Spanish language.
I regret this immensely in my own last decade as i met a few Spaniards on my
travels i really would have liked to communicate with most deeply. . I have
brilliant radar for all the self pitying label-speak. That is what really
grabbed me about you. The absence of it all. I know you don’t think like that.
Even in the rural wilds where one has to get on with life, and just get on with
life and anyway there is so much to be grateful for and so much beauty to revel
in, all i hear is moaning about some label the person imagines defines them.
Britian is finished (and as a true cause warrior it is the reason no one REALLY
cares about Assange’s free speech or other similar causes – i despair...i saw
movements i was in the centre of completely dissolve into nothing as all these
sel;f obsessed folk started to dictate via their perceived ‘differences’. You
care about justice for a few free speech chaps. And you wear that on your
sleeve. (there is no hope by the way - i am THE only Free speech operator who
was allowed to make some headway and of course i have monitored carefully how
the powers that be behave.... nope.... 84 Tory majority doesnt only mean a
nation of greedy money mad bourgeoisie who do vote for that system! , it also
means a nation – a people, who no longer REALLY are about Assange and Snowden
and those that came before them. For years i have tried to find a common
language that works with ordinary fairly serious people – especially as when 2 years ago it was obvious via big
tech etc censorship was returning. Orwellspeak and Kafkaesque censorship. Truth
is 95% of British people no longer even know who Voltaire was I sort of started
a purely info new twitter last year
https://twitter.com/ferretsarefun
mentioning my adaptation of Voltaire in the header photograph, hardly any of my
supposedly intelligent universal human rights savvy acquaintances get it No
hope..... People do not want to rock the boat. I knew this a year ago as i
attempted then to rev up a few more sincere folk to try and ‘do’ something –
collaborate on some grown up good film/articles about free speech and then
right to be informed (the toxic soup) ....nope, several who were all up in arms
who i have known years just faked their rage (at government) they could not
actually DO anything... virtue signaling even then... i gave up. That said i
knew one thing years ago which is to ever find anyone with whom i could at
least have vaguely good conversation with about the real world – oppression and
anti egalitarian tendencies, it is necessary for me to yes connect with people
who may live in London. But the idea of visiting... agghhhhh... (i lived there
12 years long ago)... But i have a very strange new reality – i sort of partly
moved up to this extraordinary valley. A high up valley (average 12 or 1300
foot) that has an extraordinary almost Kashmir feel to it. And the most amazing
sunsets i have encountered anywhere in UK. It is absurdly lonely except so
gorgeous that helps one forget. The few families and households around and
about are too isolated such that corvid made them all rather wonky. Or most it
seems. But i could work up here for the next 6 months i believe – there is the
work -what i like to do (part time, the rest of the time trying to reboot some
writing). Anyway bizarrely just down the hill – but the whole area is miles
away from anywhere a truly forgotten back of beyond, along an extremely narrow
potholed lane which has About 7 cars a day...is a railway station Llangunllo /
Llangynllo https://getoutside.ordnancesurvey.co.uk/local/llangunllo-powys--powys
that with only one connection gets to London in less than four hours. It is
almost like having arrived ion some time warp wormhole. Or it could be. (and
its 55 ish quid). I seem to come to (‘good’) things when it is too late. By
which i mean 4 or 5 years ago i was pondering a very part time existence
reengaging with London arts world but the whole thing of what a drain the
journey was holding me back. Now i could live in absolute wild paradise but
also pop down to London if required with no aggro. I could walk to the station
hahh hahh. Of course if i ever found any London wise modern (Corbynite, minus
the victim politics) spirit who also loved it in the wilds... and .. well i
need someone to help me occasionally do things like hold upright the fencepost
i am whacking in. So hard a job alone. Or as i am a perfect equalicsts, she
whack them in while i hold them, and of course get paid for it. But then the
true lament of my life.... one never finds good modern minds - real spirits,
who also have the spirit to easily enjoy the wilds. And i am thus thinking
about that in a writerly way, however i have recently focused in on what i
think is a real problem - too big a problem to ‘do’ anything about, but i know
no one is even speaking of this, which is that the esteem of women we need as
equals in rural places (synergy in teamwork) has without any doubt lessened the
last decade or so. In fact it is the one thing that truly saddens me and also
affects my life is thus because being around people of low esteem is so
draining and also dysfunctional. People with esteem problems cannot efficiently
work with one as their feelings are always drowning out simple fellowship on
the job... (someone needs to write a book about this – i have the tales to tell
but as a man in modern uk i cannot write that book of course..) Coming back to
my opening line. For some years – after 2010 -12 ish when i spent a lot of time
truly letting go into a new (post bereavement) almost slightly transcendental
state where for some years i also discovered never ever ever trust anyone who
thinks they have some divine insight - or especially any knowledge one must pay
for – even 50p is a rip off, i did however and still do browse my way through a
range of what is called ‘new thought’ (i am sure you are in touch enough to
know that phrase) ). This is all the modern or in fact ‘post modern’ freeing up
of notions on physics metaphysics and all sorts of ‘work’ on the self –
emotional intelligence etc etc etc....relativist stuff etc.... (Russell Brand
becoming a sort of absurd leader in some of this – but there are many far more
measured playing the same game in public without his rather obscene celebrity
world obsessions, for example David Fuller of ‘Rebel Wisdom’ Gabor Mate etc etc
etc....) For some years every other word is ‘connect’ (from these people who in
one way or other are paid money to share their words and charismatic
personhood) - i distrust them; but that is video self publicity. When the
people i did need – like Extinction Rebellion members etc also started to by
default use that word, but never ever ever follow through with action... i knew
it was a dangerous, in fact non-word. I think that word has damaged society a
lot. It is typically British-performative.... But that isn’t any contentious
matter as all i am about is as a last ever attempt to see if there may be
someone with a fair mind left who may wish to get out from some city and enjoy
a bit of summer here. (my true wish for some years was some kind of writing
thinking partner – collaboration to me is next to godliness) And i am sharing a
page
https://ruralralph.blogspot.com/p/mister-strong.html
And a message i wrote to someone - food for
thought if there are any thinkers left. Dont worry no one ever ever seems to
ever reply to anything. Even when someone says they would like to take a
discussion forward. I am good at solitude. Farewell. Message copy: Hi, last
word. Or a few. This is a message i am sending to just a couple of genuinely
‘green’ people. And truths is so few are genuinely all the way green. In fact i
am sending it to you as many years sort of studying and thinking about the
reality of rural environmental thinking i concluded some years ago woman/ man
is terribly important and no one talks about it, but in fact even more hard
truth is that the damaged / low esteem of many women who live in rural areas is
even more a deep real issue that is essential to figure in environmental
management of the land. As an intelligent woman you may find that interesting.
(no ....calling them ‘vulnerable’ and calling the cops is NOT the answer!) Or
lets just say i havent met anyone for years it seems they wish to converse
equally about issues others just go weird on. (and last chance current unique
opportunity someone surely would enjoy – and i dont mean ‘enjoy’ me 🙂Image... a bit of occasional work helping out in
the hills but in fact more just enjoying the place... can hide away in a tent
somewhere ....no could be part time.... and interestingly there is a train
station close by )
From web: Departs
at 09:07 Llangynllo [LGO] 3h 52m 1 change(s) Moreview details on the 09:07
service from Llangynllo to London Euston Arrives 12:59 London Euston
[EUS]Platform 7
My main
thing in fact the last few years is that i have sought a special place to go
and live – truly back to nature. However that means being a fair way from
habitation. Or at least a little way as even agricultural noise these days can
be rather unpleasant. Anyway a few months ago i was offered some work in a
pretty remote spot i had not been to before, and it turns out that it is simply
uniquely beautiful and quiet and there is much wonderful wildlife around. The
sunsets - high up with only 100 miles of Welsh hills to the West, are sublime.
I am addicted to them. The ‘politics’ of being in areas like this are however
tenuous. Meaning a man alone is not that welcome. Trouble is assumed. I am
teetotal but no point telling anyone that these days they assume the worst. The
land i am working at has two female residents. (they dont do the work i do).
Thus household needs someone to do this fencing and renovation so I am
tolerated. But i lament that it could be something much more fun and joyful. I
keep entirely to myself - there are issues in their household nothing to do
with me. All too weird for me. I would love to have some sane co-worker around
a bit. It would transform the situation. Anyway so politically such a job is so
so so much smoother if one has a friend alongside. I stay out of the residents’
minor feuds and long-term issues with one another. I like peace. It is however
a unique place and it would work better for me if i had someone around some of
the time – they can share the work (and wages !!) And after the last 2 years i
am trying to see if anyone would love to really get away from it all – the
energy up here is uniquely wonderful. And i dont have to work hard – at my own
pace.. Would love to actually have an intelligent conversation as i do... No
strings no aggro as i like peace. I have never lived in such a peaceful place
and wish it to stay so.... All a hotch potch - i was trying to essay on various
things but its sort of collected here https://ruralralph.blogspot.com/p/mister-strong.html
https://ruralralph.blogspot.com/p/lifestyle.html
https://ruralralph.blogspot.com/
i am just so so tired of the internet would love to not type one message ever
again and just type my essays i rather like doing .... and speak to humans only
on 07727 eight four 0 304 And here is a message i wrote last week to a truly
intellectual brilliant equalicist woman i know - my one true soulmate
...ish.....unfortunately she is based in Brussels and wont come and live in the
hills: Don’t worry i know when i am REALLY beaten, finished, fail. In
everything. (you spoke of failure so well!) On the last day of my fifties. And
no word from my only daughter on fathers day. But that is about the distant
past. Funny thing is (‘ironic’ ‘funny’) this week again i have had pushed in my
face the real project i have failed on. Though one day i will try to write
about it It is about women. But not in a good way. And ‘gender politics’ became
so stupid and hateful in uk i hate this but i KNOW this is the reality: The
majority of the ‘environment’ is rural. It is not cosmopolitan modern-minded
cities. Unfortunately in some ways gender roles went ‘backwards’ especially in
2020. I know that is true. Women left at home cooking and cleaning. But in
rural places we need a good mix of women and men working together as equals.
BUT.. the BIG PROBLEM: Women may be involved in the land. I have in the last 7
or 8 years worked for more women than men - helping restore their land. BUT if
THEY have bad (low) self esteem it is dysfunctional and unpleasant working for
them. Or ‘with’ them really. Negotiating how to do work on land in harmony with
nature. Working ‘with’. It is very difficult to work harmoniously with anyone
who has low self esteem. They ‘people please’ – this means they pretend,
smiling, to listen to a suggestion, or agree. Privately their head is in a
turmoil because of their personal problems. It is very hard. I do not like it.
I am so so so so so bored meeting only women with low self esteem. They cannot
be ‘equal’ and at peace in their minds. Peace is good. Many women away from
cities now i think have worse self esteem than maybe 5 years ago. This is
tragic. And it corrupts and damages all relationships in the rural places. And
it means it is harder to work efficiently to do work that is necessary. Protect
resources. Protect the environment. So many women with low self esteem means
the work to protect the environment does not get done. It fails. All ends in
disarray. This week it happened again. That situation – a woman with low self
esteem i realised i cannot rely on. I failed because it means my work will
fail. I accept that. I hope i die very quickly it is so boring being with so
many people with bad self esteem. I need to be a hermit now living in the hills
in a cave. I give up.
Sat 17:12
You sent
ps its
extraordinary how so many women 'ghost'..🤣🥸.. i never usually lower myself to
emojiis...it is quite damaging - was very damaging to the cause..i never take
it personal.... real reason i would also like to encourage some truth talker
like you up to my area and have been trying for years is THE VERY BEST eco
goddess i have ever met Sarah J runs her own rewilding spot 11 acres ...and she
talks truth with me - i trained her to.... ALL serious eco youngers should meet
her.... but also for 3 ish years i have
been begging her even slightly blackmailing to try and rollout some more of her
'model' elsewhere.... she is genus at it
and lovely woman my age ...married... but they need younger more tough minded
types to kick her up bum and make her try and replicate more of her 11 acres...
someone like you... i give up.......
hahh hahhh throw myself in river ...links to sarah are in PLUS the actual woman
i am in love with - all good minds should be listening to Meg..... links in https://ruralralph.blogspot.com/2022/07/perks.html
(i told her about you just this morn in a chat.." maybe one of the few who
really do MEAN it.." and someone else i met - journo from Positive News (20 years ago our
bible) we have read for years... 10+ yrs ago i began to get suspicions...my
journo friend told me yes it became an utter London based con operation 13
years ago ish...told me the whole tale
